What Deleting my Facebook Taught Me

*This post was written 5+ years ago for my old blog. Some sentences may reflect that period of my time, despite my best edits. 

Many years ago, I did what most people wouldn’t dream of doing…

And that was to delete my Facebook.

Yup, you’ve heard right. I deleted my Facebook.

Okay, maybe there’s a bit of an exaggeration… I didn’t delete it, but I deleted all my friends and data, and use Facebook solely for Messenger, Marketplace, and Mommy groups.

I chose to delete my Facebook because I was getting tired of comparing my life with my peers. I was seeing hundreds of vacation photos, sappy love-dovey photos, wedding photos, baby photos, and almost everything else. It’s not that I despise my life, but I couldn’t help but compare some aspects of my life with my peers. For example, I’m working full time while I see others travelling across Asia; I’m still in a happy relationship with Dan, but my classmate from math class just had her second child already. I see friends celebrating their new promotion, and I’m still at an entry-level position.

I realized it started to make me a bit upset and resentful of where I am in life and those around me. I got envious of how some of my colleagues are so successful already, and how I feel like I’m not supposed to be where I am in my life.

It’s funny because I’ve taken a course called ‘Being Online’ as one of my electives, and we focused on the negative impact social media has on its users, and I was a victim. For a moment, I forgot that people fabricate their lives on the internet and post only the best of the best for the world to see. Not every couple is happy, and not even vacation was purchased on disposable income.

And, when it wasn’t my mental health being preyed upon by social media, I also wasted a lot of time on it. Every morning, I would waste about ten minutes just scrolling through feeds. Or every time I’m bored at work, I’ll launch Facebook and see what’s happening – let’s not even talk about how fast my phone battery used to die.

The messenger was also another thing. I hated being “available” 24/7 for people acquaintances to message me about a favour or pitch me their pyramid scheme. I wanted to connect with my friends and only those who I shared my phone number.

So, ultimately, I decided to step away from it. I deleted Facebook, and within two weeks, I felt much better. I was happier, more productive and didn’t waste much more time than I needed to.

What did I learn from deleting my Facebook?

• There’s no point in comparing your life with your peers. You’ve heard it a billion times, but it’s right – we’re all on different paths.
• Those who matter would take the time to exchange alternative methods of communication. When I first deleted my Facebook, I didn’t announce it to the world. I just did it. Kendel was the first person to notice and reach out to me on Twitter, and then exchanged numbers again to talk on WhatsApp.
• Social media is a lie. People will always post the best of the best.
• It’s refreshing to let your brain not be cluttered with pointless life updates from people you haven’t spoken to in 5+ years and don’t care about. Do I really need to know what Susan did on Thursday night?
• The ten minutes I spend every morning lying in bed scrolling through my Facebook feed can now be spent snoozing for another ten minutes or getting a ten-minute head start on my day.
• My eyes can rest from rolling at yet another useless rant.
• I no longer feel the need to update my 600 friends about my life, aka read this sentence, as I no longer feel the need to “impress” people about my vacations and wonderful boyfriend. Yes, I’m not going to lie – I share only the best of the best highlights of my life.
• People genuinely applaud me for deleting Facebook, yet they can’t bring themselves to delete it because “it’s the only way to keep in touch with everyone”.
• Nearly everyone agrees that they felt the negativity of comparing their lives to their peers.
• My phone battery actually lasts until I get home from work.
• My phone is much quieter.
• I no longer have to write cheerful Happy Birthday messages to people I no longer have a connection to.

But, life without Facebook has its cons as well:

• My blog engagement has decreased since I stopped sharing my posts on various blogging groups.
• I sometimes can’t obtain bonus packages in my mobile games because I have no Facebook account to connect it to.
• I always have to explain why I chose to delete my Facebook, which always follows with “Oh my gosh, I feel the same way! But I can’t delete my Facebook because I need to connect with everyone.”
• I sometimes miss seeing what my ex-classmates and acquaintances are up to and knowing what their latest news is without meeting up for coffee and small talk.
• I get no more Facebook invites, which means if I get invited to something, I don’t know who’s going, don’t know any immediate updates or changes, or sometimes people just forget me.
• I also miss reading viral news and seeing random/funny videos.
• I also miss getting notifications for events around my city… I mean, 95% of the time I’m not going, but it’s nice to know what’s happening around town.

I still have Twitter and Instagram, which, oddly enough, I don’t feel like I’m comparing my life on those platforms. For Twitter, it’s filled with just bloggers and blog posts, and none of my friends are on it. On Instagram, I follow celebrities, memes, and fashion accounts.

I don’t think I had an unhealthy obsession with Facebook, but I ultimately decided that it’s better for me to delete my Facebook. I don’t think I would ever re-join Facebook, as it’s extremely refreshing and I’m genuinely happy and relaxed without Facebook. It’s amazing how one site can do this to people!

What are your thoughts on Facebook? Would you be deleting it anytime soon?